I got in an argument with God, guess who won? Actually, there is not a loser in the discussion. Just truth. So over the past few weeks, I have been attending Mass and Adoration and private prayer with an argument in my heart. I was told to do something that seems fairly clearly to be direction from the Holy Spirit but it was not of my wanting. I actually just wanted to do something else and I brought my many reasons to God. One by one my concerns were answered.
Before sharing the following story it should be clearly noted, it is not officially approved. As a matter of a fact the first time, I brought it to the attention of a Priest he asked if there was any fruit in my life because of it. The answer was yes. I had prayed multiple times at Mass for the salvation of a grievous soul. Another time when I brought it to the attention to our local Priest he suggested it was a psychological manifestation of the story. Maybe, I do not understand what that means but I would think in order for that statement to be true I would have had the understanding that I was super holy or at the very least trying hard to obtain it. This story is complete grace as all our stories are. I did not earn it. I was not devoting time to meditating on deep spiritual truths. I was just going through the motions of worship like everyone else that is a practicing Catholic. I was just trying my best but my best was far from where I am now and so very, very far from where I am hopefully going. I did not know this grace could be bestowed. Although, I had heard some things in passing but nothing to the degree to the story.
A friend recently said, “If you know something it is your responsibility to pass it on.” Pass every blessing on. The following redric is my truth.
So one night I dreamed of hell. I had a guide. He was a priest that wore a Cossack. He took me through a desert. It was a long walk. There was nothing really in sight just him, who I was suppose to follow, sand, and a few tumble weeds once in a while. So eventually we are in hell. He points out to me that I am safe. The only thing I can hear is him. I could not hear anything of my surroundings. He points out that I can not smell and he was right I could smell nothing. There were evil spirits all around me but I could not feel them either. I could only see my guide with a dim light so that I was not fearful. He points to the side and tells me to look. So I look. There is a man talking with a women at the bar. I was like, so what and said to the guide, “It just looks like they are having fun.” Then the guide said, “look again.” I did and it was indescribably horrible. (No words could adequately describe) In a split second I could see his soul and her soul. Some souls were filled with only one deadly sin some with many more 2,3,4…those deadly sins were the things that motivated their every action. It was in their unclean soul. That is why they were in hell. There was a pit also. At first it just looked like a sunken sofa but it was a never ending pit of hell. I could see people hanging on to branches screaming, yelling for help, (although I could not hear them) trying to climb up, and reaching for help. Anyhow, it came with an immense amount of information. I only truly looked for a second. The sight filled me with such horror. I said to the guide, “I do not belong here” and immediately I was not there. I was at the wall of hell. The guide explained to me that it was an unimaginable amount of miles away from actual hell. The thickness of the wall was also incomprehensible. It was all explained to me. He than told me to touch the wall. I told him I believed him and did not need to touch the wall to believe him. He than took my right hand and for a split second pressed it against the wall. I immediately pulled back and woke up. I was in bed. The dream felt so real. I instinctively touched the bottom of my feet and there was no sand.
I do not know if it was a day later, a few days, or a week later but my hand pealed. It was many deep layers of skin that had turned white. It did not hurt. It did not seem infected. I did not go to the doctor for it. I was very skeptical that I had visited hell. I told no one of the dream. I showed my office mate and she also agreed with me; That perhaps it was a chemical burn from running my hand across the table of one of my clients coffee or dining room tables. Thinking that they may have prepared drugs like meth on a table surface. I was well respected in my job so I called the police and explained to them that my hand had a skin peal and I thought it may have been due to a chemical burn. They agreed. Asked me for addresses of the places that I had visited in the last few days, or maybe it was even over the past week or so. They than took drug dogs to those locations and reported back to me that they found nothing. I started to think that perhaps I really had visited hell.
Sometime later I ran across the book on I think St. John Basco. I had the book from tan publishing on my shelf for quite a while before I decided to read it. As I read it, I got scared about the similarity that was in his book describing hell and my dream. I took the book and threw it, sliding it against the basement floor. I was no saint. I was never going to be a saint.
Once I more fully believed that I had a prophetic representation of visited hell in a dream, my life changed. I have since prayed for many souls. I started attending Mass more. I received the Eucharist often. I started attending the sacrament of confession frequently, almost weekly for a while. I tried hard to root out sin in my life and purify my heart of pride, envy, lust, anger, gluttony, greed, and sloth. Which has proven to be an endless task. I consecrated myself to Our Holy Mother Mary and mercy. If there is fruit of it being true it is found in my life and in my heart. Even if I do fail at times.
Points of my concern;
- Know that I do not wish to share doom and gloom. If hell is true, the good news is heaven is too.
- You do not have to believe my story. It has taken me quite some time to accept that it happened to me. I do not expect you to accept this without question.
- Direct your questions to God. My answers will likely fall short of proclaiming HIS glory.
- Hate sin. Love people.
- Rid your life of deadly sin and strive for virtue in your life.
- Radically believe in heaven and hell.
- Christ is Risen. from the dead
Trampling over death by death
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave.
- Oh Hell, where is your sting?